關於 build better boundaries ，我們在網路上蒐集到這些相關的討論、資訊與評價

[How We Launched the AppWorks #20 Accelerator Programme in the Midst of a Pandemic]

AppWorks Accelerator will celebrate its 10th year anniversary and our 20th accelerator batch in 2020. At the end of 2019, we completed our recruitment of AppWorks #20, a total of 28 teams hailing across Taiwan, Hong Kong, Singapore, Vietnam, and the United States. Originally we were expected to gather in Taipei in March to launch our five-month accelerator program -- that was before the Coronavirus outbreak.

At the beginning of February this year, with the rapid spread of the Coronavirus, countries around the world begin to enforce strict immigration controls, which directly impacted our arrangement: among the 28 teams of AppWorks #20, up to half of the overseas teams couldn’t enter Taiwan, and if they were able to enter, they were required to self-quarantine for two weeks!

How can our accelerator help entrepreneurs in this bleak environment? With our founders in mind, these are the top objectives we wanted to achieve in our contingency plan:

1. Keep all our participants safe and healthy
2. The programme should not bring any inconvenience to our founders
3. Provide assistance to our founders as per our original programme

We decided that AppWorks #20 would still kick off in March as planned, but we would move the entire programme online.

Bringing the programme online sounded easy at first, since everyone is used to video conferencing nowadays. But offline activities still have some advantages that are hard to replace: better interaction and a greater ability to build trust. So for our online programme, we designed our activities to be either 1-on-1s or small group discussions as much as possible, so as to facilitate intimacy and deeper conversations that one would find in offline interactions.

Our communication with the international teams also needed to be more transparent and frequent; in a highly unpredictable environment and without the ability to communicate face-to-face, we are prone to miscommunication. This leads to misunderstandings and uncertainty. Overcommunication is essential to counteract this. To eliminate ambiguity and confusion we send out weekly emails and WhatsApp messages to let our founders know what’s happening in our programme, how to join our online sessions, and what's to come. We also compile the latest immigration regulations for all our teams on a weekly basis, and liaise closely with the local government authorities to provide our founders the latest update on subsidy plans and visa applications processes in Taiwan.

In these chaotic times, the core strength and resilience of the team is vital to the survivability of any venture. The toughest moments are also the best opportunities for founders to be honest to themselves and examine the health of his or her team and make the necessary adjustments: is your product a “must have” or is it a “nice to have”? Is your cash flow sustainable? What expenditure needs to be cut? Which projects should be rolled out on schedule; which should be adjusted; or even, which of these should be postponed or canceled?

For AppWorks, this is another chance to push the boundaries of our comfort zone. We are working endlessly alongside our founders to provide assistance, strengthen our foundations, while also preserving energy, so we can pounce with thrice the velocity onto the right opportunity.

By Jack An, Analyst AppWorks

Photo credit: Ryan from PitchSpot (AppWorks #20) on Orientation Day

We will launch the AppWorks #21 registration programme in May. Please refer to our website and leave your best contact information. We will inform you immediately when the application is officially open: https://bit.ly/2wXfBuU

Part 3 and the last part to talking and teaching your little one about “Stranger Danger”. ❤️

Good morning,

We've talked the last few days about the terrifying statistics and what you can do as a parent, how to protect your little online, but what about your little? How do you teach your toddler protective behaviors?

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1. BE HONEST
The first step to Respectful Parenting and keeping our littles safe is just to be honest with them. Why can’t they play hide and seek in public? Why can’t they follow someone without asking mama? Why can’t they let anyone touch their private parts?

Be mindful of their age and how much they can understand, listen to your mama gut and speak from the heart. “Please check with mama before you eat anything anyone gives you because I have to make sure it is safe."

Why does mama have to keep you safe? Because you are so precious to me and I don't want to lose you.

Does your little know and understand your why? Or are we just saying no, stop, cannot, don’t! Think about the times in your life you’ve really understand the purpose and the vision and how it has affected the outcome. It’s the same with our littles too, if they know the why, they are a lot more willing to follow through and do it.

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2. BE CONSISTENT
Do your rules change depending on the day? Ultimately, we want our littles to be so familiar with their routine that they do it without thinking.

Hold mama’s hands when we cross the street. Wait for mama to say yes before going in an elevator. You don’t have to hug anyone you don’t want to - no means no.

Making sure that we are consistent with our boundaries is key to helping our toddlers build their own consistent healthy boundaries.

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3. ALLOW QUESTIONS
Little ones are always so curious because that’s how they learn about how the world works. Do you have a culture in your family where they are safe to ask questions?

Again not only does us answering honestly and them getting to explore and ask questions help them understand the why and get behind it better, it also fosters an open relationship.

Open, honest, intimate relationships with your little is one of the best ways to curb sexual abuse because they always feel safe enough to tell you anything, ask you anything, get excited about anything that they don’t feel the need to keep secrets.

If you lay the framework and foundation when they are young, it will help so much during their vulnerable years as well as again, making them much more less attractive for someone to groom.

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4.EMPOWER
Lastly and most importantly as always, empower your little.

What can you do if someone hurts you and you don’t like it? Give them space to answer and come out with solutions. It will amaze you how much they know. You might have to prompt sometimes but with consistent space and trust, they will come out with amazing ideas.

What this really does is builds up their confidence, gives them the tools to be proactive, puts them in charge of their bodies and decisions. If there’s one thing I’m especially grateful for, it’s this.

This is what’s going to protect her when mama is not there.
Her knowing the danger signs, understanding why they are dangerous, feeling empowered and knowledgeable about what to do or to come out with a solution whether she's 2 years old or 20 years old.

***
Please let me know if you have any other questions and I really hope that this series was helpful for you and your little.

If you’re struggling with your toddler and would like a step-by-step and more in-depth walk through, I have a Toddler Wars workshop next week that covers all the hot topics like biting, hitting, sharing, car seats, terrible twos, whining, sibling rivalry, jealousy, dealing with in-laws and many more.

To find out more details or to register, go to https://kidxy.com/rk

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Racheal Kwacz is a Child and Family Development Specialist, mama tribe advocate and writer. As creator of the ‘Racheal Method’, she combines her 20+ years experience working with children in the USA and in Asia with the foundations of ‘Respectful Parenting’, leading parents and teachers around the world in raising kind, confident, compassionate, resilient little ones.
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We picked this hotel for our staycation specifically for Ella Grace. It’s one of the rare ones in the city that has a kids salt pool and for our water baby that reacts to even sunscreen, this was a big thing.

The joy of getting to explore and play independently in the shallow pool and the peace that she will likely not be covered in rashes or have her eczema flare up from the chemicals was super exciting and a huge relief.

I prefix that to say that we are the kind of parents that are generally quite cautious.

For her birthday, our swim lover really wanted a pool party with her friends so we hired a lifeguard whose sole purpose at the party was just to keep eyes on the littles in the pool. While it seemed a bit extreme for a home birthday party...this, this is why.

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I am vulnerably sharing her falling in the pool to show you how quickly it happens. How quiet and unassuming it is. One minute she is laughing the next she is panicking in knee deep shallow water she can stand in, too shocked to move or think. To know that it could have ended so differently if we weren’t watching her or if she didn’t learn to instinctively save herself.

I hope that after you watch and read this, that it changes and empowers your family to be safe around the pool and to think about some dangers or tools or classes that you might not have considered or prioritized before.

But mostly, I share because you are a part of my tribe and I want to keep you and your littles safe too.

Be safe mamas, education and prevention is key. ❤️

***
CHILD SWIM SAFETY TIPS

NO ADULT, NO WATER
Always always make sure someone is keeping an eye on your little in any body of water whether it is in the pool or tub or shallow water play. Even though J and I were just a few feet away from her (he had just moved out of the frame so I could take a video of her being adorable) it still felt like a lifetime away.

Another big rule we have for Ella Grace especially w a pool in our house and even w the bathtub, she has to wait until we’re in the pool or we put her in the tub before she can get in. No adult, no water.

DROWNING IS SILENT
If you were just glancing, you would just think she was playing in the water and not realize she was flailing because she was panicking. Often, we think drowning is the victim screaming for help and splashing around but if they can’t breathe, they can’t scream. 😭💔

STAY CALM.
I have no idea how I managed to stay calm but I knew she needed me to and I knew I needed to tell her to STAND UP in the clearest way possible. I wasn’t dressed for the pool and didn’t want to panic her even more but if she had struggled anymore, I would have jumped in there without a doubt to pull her out.

SWIM TRAINING
Through swim training, she also knows that if she’s in trouble, she swims to the side and tries to pull herself out (thank you Aquabubs Swim School for all those hours of practicing) it was so good to see her instinctively do that.

DEBRIEF
She had a big cry after and we held her but didn’t gush panic over her (even though I felt 😱😱😱) so she didn’t build a fear of water. We made space for her to be scared and recover and within a few minutes, she went back to playing.

But more importantly, we debriefed again later on what happened and with what she did right - check to see if your feet can reach the ground then get to the side for help - reframing fear and helplessness for brave and able.

SECONDARY/DRY DROWNING
Another big thing to look out for if your little swallows a lot of water accidentally is secondary drowning. In swim, they teach us not to do more than three to six submersions an hour and to make sure that her belly is still soft and not rigid/bloated full of water. Secondary drowning signs don’t occur immediately but progressively over a few days - drowsiness, irritability, fever, nausea/vomiting, child being ”off”, coughing, breathlessness.

In this instance, she didn’t swallow enough water to worry about secondary drowning but if your little requires intervention in a pool incident or anytime after pool time w littles, although rare, it’s still good to know the signs and symptoms to look out for.

TOYS OUT
We all know that our favorite little people have very poor impulse control so a big rule we always have is taking any toys/balls out of the pool after play when we are done. It removes the temptation no matter how “well” they listen or behave. To us we see the pool as danger but to them, it’s a giant playgym.

Also something to consider is the fake bravado of having floats on. It actually works against them learning to swim in the long run and might actually keep them underwater if it slips or is under inflated but more than that, swimming w littles still absolutely requires adult supervision regardless if they have floats on or not.

LET THEM BE LITTLE
Having said that, let them be little. Let them explore, let them have fun, let them play and splash around. It’s what childhood memories are made of but also be very firm of your boundaries.

No running around the pool. No jumping in by yourself. No pushing anyone into the pool.

Even if I bubble wrap her, I still can’t guarantee she’ll never get hurt. Instead I have to teach her to be safe around water. Empower her. Supervise.

I do my best until I know better and when I know better, I do better.

That’s the sum of what it means to be a parent. You do your best. You let them be little. You lead with love.

We got this, mamas. My mama heart still wants to bubble wrap her but I know instead, I have to teach her to fly.

Ps. Check out comments to see a picture of her after!